the gypsies - week one

We packed up our house just over a week ago. It feels like an age.

Our last day in Newtown was a rainy one. We had camped on our bedroom floor after packing up all our things into a storage container.
We had breakfast at our go-to cafe for the very last time. I had the pancakes. With ice-cream.
Time to celebrate eh?



















Then it was a long day of cleaning.
We had booked a steam cleaner to come at 3pm.
When he turned up at one I freaked out. I had to move everything off the carpets.
I was home alone.
When the guy I imagined to be a short middle eastern man turned out to be a tall blonde stereotypical Scandinavian man I left the front door open. It all felt a little too much like a bad taste film.

After pack pack packing and clean clean cleaning we headed to the country. I had a cramp in my scrubbing arm and as we drove off after dropping off our keys I began to feel so sad.
It was the end of an era.
Four long joyful hard blessed years.
And just like that, it was gone.

We drove west for my nieces first birthday, spent the weekend there and then drove down the inland route to Ulladulla. It was so great to drive a different way. It was mostly the same way we drove to our honeymoon and brought back some lovely memories.

We holidayed by the beach with college friends. It was a GREAT week.
I'm going to miss seeing those people regularly. We had seven adults and six kids in a little shack by the sea. We swam and ate and drank port. We chatted and laughed and told very immature jokes.

By Friday we were feeling well rested and happy.

Our youth group camping plans had been cancelled because of rain and the youth camp was happening at church so we headed up the coast to Sydney.

I should have known something was wrong when the little one had an accident en route. A messy accident. And then I got tired. Real tired.

My throat was sore, my head pounding. I ached. I could barely get out of the car to fetch doughnuts from Berry. In fact I didn't. I attempted it then Myl had to come to the rescue. 

The little ones were grizzly. I can only imagine they felt it too but had no words to tell me.
We got to the church hall, set up, and slept.

The next day was a bit of a blur. I slept and got up, slept and attempted food. The girls slept and played. Myl was an angel. And then he got it too.

We stayed the night with friends but our plans to go camping all the next week we feared would need to be put on hold. We needed somewhere to rest and recuperate. Somewhere to lick our wounds. So I write this sitting on the lounge at good ole Mum and Dads. We're here for the next little while till we feel all better and then...who knows!

Norah's Birth Story - Part Three

Part Three

We kept going. The heart monitor was not doing its job while I moved around. I was getting pretty annoyed about having to wear it and didn’t mind much when it dropped out but the doctors were getting antsy. Each time I had a contraction I would move and the monitor would cut out making it look like a dip in the heart rate. They started talking about putting a clip on our little ones head. That did it for me. I remembered the same thing happening with Lucy and it was the worst pain I have ever experienced. The stubborn angry lady came out of me. I declared I would not be having the clip and made up my mind to do each contraction standing. (The best position for the monitor.) I longed to lean over the bed or the balance ball or just crawl into a corner but I just couldn’t bring myself to have that clip. I laboured on growing more and more tired but finding the energy to work through each contraction.

Myles was amazing. We talked before this day about what I would like him to do and as I went through it all he was so good at meeting my requests. We spent many contractions staring into each other’s eyes, breathing together. It was all very Ina May. I’m so glad we got to labour together. I think it really strengthened our marriage no matter how hard the following hours would be.

The contractions were coming quickly. I was breathing and moving through them but had barely any time to rest in between. I was getting excited. Having not been through labour before I thought that this must be what it is like. I was sure I’d be at least eight centimetres dilated. But at 2am another check told me I was only three, maybe four centimetres and still barely effaced.

I was exhausted. Physically and mentally. For almost two whole days I had been gearing up to have this baby. I’d been totally absorbed in getting labour going and after nine hours on the drip I was chugging along very slowly. I’d been standing up for the last five or so hours. I’d been pleading with my body to let my baby out and it just wasn’t working.

The doctors came in a number of times telling me what I already knew. They wanted to take me to surgery. Our girl wasn’t distressed but she also wasn’t budging. My contractions, though they were coming close together were not particularly strong. I could have slapped the doctor when he told me I didn’t look like the contractions were uncomfortable. “This is what nine months of training for a calm birth get you!” I should have yelled. But he meant well.

I’d been texting my mum through the whole process. She was at home with Lucy. She gave me so much encouragement. It felt like having her in the room not just receiving her texts but remembering all the words she has spoken to me in my pregnancy and in my life. What a blessing to grow up with a midwife mother. She taught me about birth, about how to prepare yourself and deal with the marathon of labour. She taught me about natural childbirth and how to stick up for your rights as a pregnant woman. Though she was looking after my firstborn she was right there with me in the wisdom she embedded in my heart and soul. She is the reason I knew I had to fight for my natural birth. I knew I would have to exhaust every option so that I would feel empowered about my birth experience the next day.

I collapsed into Myles arms. So much of me wanted to give up. But I knew that I had to give my all. I had to know that I did all I could do. So I asked for more time.

They gave me two hours. I could go for a caesarean now or in two hours. It didn’t seem like very long and in fact it wasn’t. During the two hours they kept checking and checking. Nothing improved. The decision was taken out of my hands. I would go in for surgery again.

It took longer this time than with Lucy. Because our girl wasn’t distressed they had more time.  I signed the form and the midwives prepped me for surgery. They took out my drip and I sat down. It felt so good to sit down. The contractions all but stopped. Another blow. It was all the drugs. My body hadn’t taken over. Myles and I chatted. Despite the disappointment in my body it was pretty exciting. We would see our little girl soon. By hook or by crook she’d be out soon. I couldn’t wait to meet her.

Off to surgery I went on my stretcher bed with my chin held high. It was all very casual and friendly. The surgeons made jokes as they wheeled me in. Nice ones. It was the most familiar part of my labour so far. Once again I surrendered my body to the hospital machine. I sat up on the bed while they put in the spinal block. The anaesthetist took a good few goes to get it in. I began to feel very nervous. I tried not to think about the knife or the needle for that matter. My body went numb, they called Myles in and began.

In high tradition Myles and I sung our little girl into the world. Lord of Lords, Let the Weak Say I Am Strong, Jesus Paid it All. My voice was weak but my heart was willing. Myles will tell you I seemed quite out of it. I think after all that time I was just happy for the lie down.

After what seemed like not long at all I heard that blessed sound. Our girls first cry. She was gurgling and spluttering a bit. A bit of something had gone down the wrong pipe. But she was out! My heart filled up and ran over. There is no sweeter noise. Myles went over to cut the cord and then brought our girl straight over to me. We had told the doctors that I wanted skin to skin straight away. They had laid all the dressings so that we could. 

My Norah girl was put on my tummy and there we lay looking at one another. She was a dark purply pink colour and had a thick mop of black hair. She was covered in gloop but she was mine. My sweet girl. It was just after four in the morning. The twenty first of March.

She nosed around for a while and then leapt her way over to her first feed. They took us up into recovery and then to my room. I had lost a fair bit of blood in the operation but didn’t need a transfusion. We settled in to our shared room and Myles fell asleep on the floor. The sun came up on Norah’s birthday and I held her in my arms so glad that she had come safely into the world.

Norah's Birth Story - Part Two

Part Two

It had been a long day. It was thirty-one hours since my water had broken and I still wasn’t in labour.  Our appointment at 1:30 was to listen to Norah’s heartbeat to make sure she wasn’t in distress. We headed to the place where they do ultrasounds and I was hooked up to the heart rate monitor. She was beating a little fast so we started singing again and I turned on my side. That seemed to calm things down a bit.

Despite all the drama it was so great to spend all this time with Myles. We spent a lot of time just chatting. In between all the bits and pieces there was a lot of waiting. Waiting for doctors, waiting for heart rates, walking to and from the hospital. We chatted about all kinds of things. Baby things and life things. It was nice to take my mind off worrying. We joked around and kept things light. It was nice.

They gave us the ok and we headed down to the birth centre. Back into the room we went and the midwife came to check. My contractions had all but stopped and any that came weren’t strong. It wasn’t a good sign.

So we had the chat. The midwife gave me my options. Because of all the other factors they were a bit worried. I could go straight to surgery, have an induction or keep waiting. I wanted to give it my best shot. I decided to induce. It seemed that if our girl hadn’t come after more than 24 hours it was unlikely she would come without a bit of extra help. This meant once more leaving the birth centre. A familiar path to tread.

Off we went to settle in. We dimmed the lights and put on our music. We made our little room our home. We met our midwife who was lovely and the same age as me. She told me I would need to be monitored the whole time and that the wireless monitor was not available. Oh. I asked if I could have it as soon as it was figuring that with a non existent first time labour and a twelve hour induction timeline I would be there for a while. Our girl was doing well. Heartbeat normal but happy to stay inside.

A nurse came in to put my canula in for the drip. She tried my left arm and missed. Of all the needles you can get, this is not a particularly nice one and when it goes in wrong it hurts like billy-o. I practiced my calm birth. Easy breathing, stay calm. The nurse went to get someone else. A doctor came in to have a go. Bingo, in it went but when the midwife flushed it with water my arm started to swell up. She’d got it in my tissue. Weirdest feeling ever. Easy breathing, stay calm. I was starting to get nervous and we hadn’t even begun. Another spot on my arm, another bruise, another doctor and it went in. They gave me some fluids and said they’d be back with the induction drip.

Myles and I chatted and hung about. We listened to Norah Jones and sung along. They started the drip at about 5pm. Here we go. The contractions came slowly. We could watch them on the machine. The numbers went high when the contraction came and back down as it faded away. Up to 20 and down. Up to 30 and down. They were really gentle. The midwife mentioned something about a gown and I ignored her. I had this I thought. I was standing and swaying and dancing and breathing to practice for when they became more intense. After about an hour I decided to lie down and rest. I was in for a long night.

When I was lying down the heart monitor started to loose the plot. The monitor is a couple of big plastic disks they place on your tummy. Every time I moved they seemed to loose position causing the machine to stop reading our little ones heartbeat. Most of me did not care a toss. I resented the continuous monitoring but the doctors needed to make sure she was ok because a dip in heart rate is the first sign of uterine rupture. The contractions started to get stronger and the monitor was flipping out. My nap was short lived. I couldn’t lie down anymore. I had to get moving.

The hours passed by so quickly. All of a sudden it was 9pm. I had been working hard, breathing and moving. Our midwife has said she would come in at nine and see how far I had progressed. It was the moment I had been waiting for.

I was to be disappointed. I was only two centimetres dilated and barely effaced. On top of all that, the midwife thought that part of the waters hadn’t broken and said she would need to manually break them. It felt like a kick in the guts. I’d been working hard and my body was just not doing it for me. I felt exhausted and imagined the hours that stretched ahead of me. If four hours meant two centimetres then I supposed it would take me another day to get to ten. My confidence began to waver but I’d read the books where marvellous speedy dilations happened. I kept telling myself that my body knew what to do, just go with it, trust the process.

I promise the next one will be up very soon.

lately

We've been having a lovely time getting acquainted with the newest member of our family.

Norah makes a lovely addition to our family. She's a peaceful little chap.
It's been a bit of a challenge adjusting to new routines and having less time for everything but we are getting there.
Lucy loves her little sister but seems a bit overwhelmed by the whole thing sometimes.
We've been so loved by the gifts, the meals and the kind words and prayers from our family and friends.

It might be a little quiet over here for a while but be assured we are loving all the blessings of this new season of life.

camping with a toddler

Our first point of holiday business was a trip up the coast to go camping.
I knew that if we didn't get away then our holidays could easily slip away without us doing anything.

So off we went to Umina Beach.
It was so good.

I was a bit nervous about how Lu would go. She would make or break our holiday. A week without napping or late crazy nights would be enough to make camping forever a dirty word but she was an absolute champ. She was going through a brilliant sleeping pattern (which has since ended) and would go to sleep with a simple "goodnight." We packed our days so full of fun that she was just exhausted each evening.

I was amazed at how little it took to amuse our little family each day. A walk along the beach, a play on the swings, a swim in the pool and a wander after the ducks. Sandwiches for lunch and BBQ for tea.

It was relaxing and also awesome.
I think we'll make camping our yearly holiday.

lucy and the baby jesus

This year was Lucys first time in the church nativity play.

She was given the choice of being a sheep or an angel. 

After educating her on what each character was, she chose an angel.

I must admit I felt the temptation to get my "stage mum" on. 

(Flap those wings. Flap, flap, flap. And smile!)

It was pretty cute. 

After all her enthusiasm and wing flapping off stage I think she became just a little overwhelmed and stood on stage staring out into the congregation. 

The best part (for Lu) about the whole thing was the baby Jesus lying in the manger. 

After church I was dragged up to look at, poke and kiss his sweet little face.

This is how we learnt that baby Adi and baby Jesus are two different people.*

*although I think it means that baby Jesus is a plastic doll with those freaky eyes that are supposed to close when you lie them down but after some time only manage to get halfway there leaving the appearance of a scary zombie baby. 

summer bucket list - the fish markets

at the start of our holidays we decided to write a list of all the things we'd like to do this summer.
they mostly revolve around food but i see no real problems here.

on the list was a trip to the fish markets.
we thought Lu would like to see all the fish even though they were mostly "sleeping."

She was pretty impressed with the lobsters crawling about in their watery cages. If only she knew their fate. We ordered some fish cocktails and chips and bought some prawns and squid to cook later in the day.

Lucy chased seagulls and led her uncle round by the hand. She has picked up the words "come on" really well and uses them often.

2 - twenty seven, twenty eight

feeling

a game of innocent christmas day backyard cricket means i can't really walk so well right now. I think i did something my my pelvic bone. It hurts like wildfire. I was feeling so happy and healthy until this moment. So so glad Myl is on holidays.

doing

now that christmas is over it's time to get ready for this baby. We are still at my parents place but when we get home i will become a little mother hen and start nesting round the place. Folding sweet little clothes and dusting the doorknobs.

thinking

i'm getting really excited about adding another little one to our family. As it gets closer and closer i start thinking less about pregnancy and more about motherhood.


twenty seven weeks of lucy
twenty eight weeks of lucy

Too many babies

We've been reading Lucy the story of Christmas.

The angels she gets.
"Angels. Flying. Sky. La la la"

And the shepherds.
"Sheep"

Even Mary and Joseph.
"Maayee. Jopis. Man."

But little baby Jesus? It's a bit complicated.
"Baby Adi?* Baby wawa?**"

There's always next year.

*baby Adi is Lucy's new cousin.
** Baby Wawa is what Lucy calls her little
Sister. Give you clues to her name?

Advent grace

I struggle so hard to be an organised person.
It's not something I find easy at all.
Each year I have the best of intentions for advent. I think of all these wonderful things to do.

This year I have fretted and fluttered about like a little lost bird. I've searched Pinterest for trendy DIY gift ideas. I've researched food to make. Roast dinners, cookies to bake with Lucy. I've thought about family and trips to see them
About how many hours we will spend I the car and about how Lucy's naps will suffer. I've thought about family dynamics and how to make people happy.

But in all that flapping I've forgotten to be still.
My homemade advent calendar went up on the 13th. My reading plan sits with only one day ticked.

I've forgotten to be still and remember the joy behind all the presents and food and family.

I forgot to remind myself of the little baby was born king, grew up to die and became our saviour.

But you know what? Advent doesn't have to start on the first of December. It's a
Mighty fine idea to do so but it's not the hard and fast rule. It doesn't even have to end on the 25th. So I'm thinking of the grace that Jesus came to share and giving it to myself. Won't you join me?

If you forgot advent this year why not start today?
Read the story of Christmas, sing a carol with your mum, do something each day to say thank you God for sending your son.

The best part

This right here is my favourite part of the holidays.
Myl is home and I get to watch my two favourites together.

Lucy adores her dada. She follows him around, gives him sweet little kisses and now calls him Mylo because that's what she hears me call him.

This is the first year he hasn't worked through the holidays and while the extra cash would be handy it's nothing compared to the joy of having him.

The happenings

We've been frolicking all over the countryside the last few weeks.

Camping
Visiting rellos
Meeting a new niece
Crafting
Faux Christmas dinner
Driving
Way too much maccas
Adjusting nap schedules
Present making
Helping move house

It's been busy.

We're all ready for some good ole chilling at home. And some cleaning of the Everest that is our washing pile.

For now we are all sick with runny noses.
Let the relaxing begin.

2 - twenty one

feeling

tired. I'm not sure if it's related to pregnancy at all (though I feel like I experienced it last time) but I've had sore sinuses right between my eyes all week. It's been making my eyes water and making me feel a bit drowsy. Hoping it goes away.


I'm getting bigger! When I bend over I can feel there is something in the way.

doing

Reading up on hypno-birthing. Anyone had any experience?
Had my very uneventful appointment with the obstetrician at the birth centre. She warned me of the perilous dangers of having a VBAC and I smiled and nodded.

thinking

About seeing smalls this Thursday. Aside from the usual "what if my baby has two heads?!" moments I've been getting excited about learning more about this little family member growing inside.
Still majorly stuck on boys names.
Also thinking about how I'm going to fit a cot in our room.





twenty one weeks of Lucy

a new room

A few weeks ago I entered and won an amazing competition from the lovely Emily over at The Beetle Shack.

Most of the prizes have arrived so this week I decided to open all the paper packages lined up by the door and get to work making a new room for our not so little one.

She is well and truly ready to be in a big bed and with smalls coming along in March it was high time to move her before she feels like she is getting kicked out of her bed to make way for a baby.
I had seen the incy interiors bed recently at the Baby and Toddler Show and swooned over it but checked my interest when I saw the hefty price tag. It looked like ikea or hand me downs for us.
So this win was really quite timely and endlessly helpful. We're not completely strapped for catch but "thrifty" is often my middle name.

I (with the heavy lifting skills of Myl) got to work earlier this week and am pretty happy with the end result. The prizes combined with a few little things already in Lucys room went together nicely. I am a big fan of lots of colour and even though it's a bit of an overload at times I think in a kids room you can get away with it.

Lucy is pretty stoked with her new space. As soon as the bed was up she was bouncing away on it only to be stopped by a fall and a sore head. She loves the new Noahs ark toy and all the bunnies round the room. She was completely transfixed by the "balls" hanging in the ceiling and loves that she can look right out the window from her bed.


The first night I was awoken a few times by little footsteps into our room but since then she has been sleeping like a trooper.

dada work

Lucy has learnt a new concept and word recently.

work

Each morning we say goodbye to Myl and say that he is off to this place called "work."
She has just become really good at the k sound and is loving words like milk, book and of course work.
But now she thinks that work is where everyone goes when you can't see them.

Myl leaves the room and I hear,
"dada work."
No, he's just downstairs.
It's not just Myl. Granny and Waa Waa come to visit and when they leave it's,
"granny work." "waa waa work."

It's pretty cute.

The other day she started walking out the door.
We have a balcony where her bike and other toys are so she usually goes out to play by herself. After a few minutes I realised she wasn't on the balcony anymore. I peeked down the stairs and there was Lucy in the garden looking around.
"What are you doing little girl?" I asked.
"Work."

I'm sure she'll discover the truth one day.

hands

We've had some really lovely hot days lately. In the afternoons after Lucy wakes up i'll fill up some buckets with water and washing up detergent and let her play in the bubbles.
She plays for ages.

One day she decided that the bubbles would be far nicer in her hair. Soon enough she was wet from head to toe. A very successful way to cool off on a hot day.

eighteen

feeling


tired. but that may have something to do with the sick husband and little girl I have been nursing back to health this week.
Feeling more and more little kicks and movements.

doing

heard smalls heartbeat on Thursday for the first time. It was sweet and very reassuring.
I've been having some not so nice pregnancy dreams. It's nice to wake up and realise that they aren't real.

thinking

This summer is supposed to be a real stinker. I'm thinking about a paddling pool for christmas.
I'm excited to find out the gender of this little babe. We couldn't get an ultrasound till 22 weeks so have a few weeks to go.



eighteen weeks of Lucy

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Noodle markets

Last Thursday we bussed down into the city for the annual night noodle markets.

Can I just say that things are often 10x more fun with the little one around.

The kid eats sushi. After nights and nights of making interesting face shaped dinners we found a win with a dollar chicken and avocado sushi roll.

The kid loves centre point tower. You kinda had to be there but there was a lot of oohing and hand waving and general amazement. Also giggling from us and about twenty people around us.

The kid kinda loves everything. The buses, the tall buildings, the Chinese dragon, the attention, the pancakes, and being around so much love and amazement is pretty fun. It kinda catches on you know.

We also ate some tasty noodles and dumplings and salt and pepper squid. Ooooh yeah!

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